Over the past few years as a runner, I have learned that one of our greatest allies, also happens to be one of our greatest enemies. When we roll our ankle on the trails or when we feel that horrific stinging pain of a stress fracture, our first trip is to vist the most trusted orthopedic doctor we can find. While this is the best thing we could ever do for our bones, it is by far the worst thing we could do to our phsyche. I was reminded of this yesterday.
I was actually filled with a fair level of excitement heading in. I have had several trips to different doctors since the accident but this was the first of any significance. I was actually going ton see how my bones were healing and get to ask questions of the man who was one day going to give me the okay to run again.
Once the X-Rays were done, my wife, brother, and I waited patiently for the doctor to arrive. Now before I go any further let ,me clear the air by saying that I am not crazy. I have a few screws loose, yes, but I am not nuts. I understand full well that I have a long road to recovery ahead of me, and that the days of winning 5k's and always qualifying for Boston may be behind me, but I am going to run again, just watch.
Well the doc walked in, and introduced himself, and seemed like a pretty nice guy. This was the doctor who had actually performed my shoulder surgery, so that was fairly comforting. What ensued next was nothing short of demoralizing. We found out that there was no way that we would be able to tell how I was healing yet. Then came the news that I may even have to have a surgery if one of the bones in my leg fails to set properly, but it was too soon to tell. Also, that it would be three months before any weight at all could be put on my leg. That, and we were looking at 6 months before I could return to my job. Then he decided to drop the atomic running A-bomb.
"Not to be grim reaper," he said, "but you may need to find some other form of endorphin achieving sport such as cycling or swimming, to meet those needs. It is going to be hard, running may never feel the same to you, and it is no secret that ortho doctors fell that running long distances is the worst thing one can do to their body."
What!?!?! So let me get this straight. I live in one of the least cycling friendly cities in America, and he wants me riding a bike, that can achieve much faster speeds than running, and the slowest most simple fall can crack my collar bone. Swimming? Swimming? I feel like Jim Mora, playoffs, playoffs? The doctor had just told me that I would most likely never have full range of motion in my shoulder again, so why on earth would I want to do that?
He ended the conversation with telling me that though getting back to running was not impossible, it may take more than I was willing to give, and it may not produce the same results, oh and orthopedic doctors think running is one of the worst things you can do to your body. He was encouraging and told me he would help me achieve what ever goals I had and that we would become close friends, and that if I returned to running he would be there, but still, his obligatory you may never this or that again had done their trick.
After that, my 40 or so stitches and 25 staples were removed, which emded up being much more tedious due to the fact that I had scabbed over almost all of the stitches, but I got through it.
I will say my mental resolve was still pretty strong,but there was still a fair amount of worry I was dealing with, and then a good friend, and local elite ultra runner shared some very encouraging words to me
After telling him what the doc said, he responded, "whatever, human spirit is much stronger than any 'tangible' componet medicine can measure. You're gonna be just fine. You can count on that. X rays don't show what's in the heart."
Amen to that brother, amen to that.
No comments:
Post a Comment